You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
