or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize