i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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