What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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