her vagine was all disorganized.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
