It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
