how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
