I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
