It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize