ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I wish i was in the wii world.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
