I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
