seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
