I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
He shit in the fireplace
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
