Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize