I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
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