I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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