porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
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