i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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