His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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