She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Drunk is a universal language darling
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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