are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Where is the hickey?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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