Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize