i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
