We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
