In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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