u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
