If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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