I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Houston, we have a blender
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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