i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
only you would photoshop your dick
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
