she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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