What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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