Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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