wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize