we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Randomize
