should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
