I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
No I am not eating basil off your cock
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
