After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
