We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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