Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Do vagina's smell?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
