Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
