Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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