Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
