The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
