idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize