Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
my shit smells like andre
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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