maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
