question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
