She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
