thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
where are my eyebrows?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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