i don't plan on having that self control this summer
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
