Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I think your dad took our porno
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
